It’s a scary thought.
It looks like everyone one else is getting a ring or at least a title. Their men are stepping up to the plate and making honest women out of them.
Yes, I bet it’s crossed your mind.
After all, everyone wants their happily ever after.
But, to have this guy you’re interested in take the first step and give you a title seems to be taking forever.
You invest a lot of time and energy in him and you eventually expect a return on all the hard work you put into trying to make it work.
You see everyone else booed up and you begin to wonder if your guy is blind or crazy. He obviously can’t see a good thing in front of him.
All you want is a title that says we’re a couple who is serious about taking this relationship to the next level.
Before you start questioning whether you’re worth a title, you should understand the whole truth.
This time, it’s possible that it’s not you.
There are 4 understandable, but not necessarily excusable types of men who won’t commit.
1.The Sensitive guy doesn’t don’t want to hurt your feelings. He wants to commit (one day) but in the meantime, he doesn’t want to lead you on. Look at it as him being honest with you.
He would rather not get your hopes up high and then leave you hanging, just because he got too busy pursuing life or he found something “better” to occupy his time. If this guy is not 110% sure that he’s ready for a relationship AND that you’re the one that he wants to be in a relationship with, he’ll be slow to give you a title.
Sure, he’s willing to practice on you and allow you to temporarily fill the vacancy as long as you’re happy to accommodate him, but in the back of his mind, you’re still “just a friend.”
And as long as he’s been honest with you up front, he can sleep at night.
2. The Confused guy doesn’t know what you want. When he says “he’s not ready for anything serious” you pretend that it’s OK, but deep inside you know you could never be happy with that- long term. But, from the way you respond to his every whim and wish, he would never know that.
Now you’ve confused him.
He thinks you’re completely fine with the way things are. Even though you may get mad for the first few days after you discuss your status, you eventually shake it off and things go back to normal. You’re right back at his house watching TV, playing video games and cooking.
He’s now wondering what’s the point in giving you a title?
3. The Petty guy majors in the minors. He knows it’s silly, petty and totally immature, but there are some things he just can’t seem to get over.
Like the mole on your cheek or the fact that your hair is not dark brown like his last girlfriend’s. Sometimes you’re too skinny and other times you’re too curvy.
It’s not that there’s anything wrong with you, he’s just looking for something different.
Even though you’re totally awesome and you give him everything he wants, he can use this little infraction to cover up the truth: he’s just not ready. It’s possible that he’s afraid, his finances aren’t right or he has a fear of missing out (FOMO) on something better.
The minor technicality is his “get out of jail” free card. Nothing personal, but it keeps him safe from having to commit before he’s ready.
4. The Scared guy probably likes you a lot, but he loves his freedom more. You may be everything he wants in a lady: beautiful, God-fearing, honest, and kind.
But none of that matters because this guy is afraid that all relationships are doomed to fail. At least that’s what history shows. Deep inside, he wants love. But love is not worth the pain and trauma that he’s experienced in his past relationships, or that he saw in his loved ones relationships.
So now he’s guarded.
He has a wall around his heart that protects him from the hurt and embarrassment that goes along with being involved with someone who could potentially hurt him.
The person who is least committed has the most power.
Your life can go on without a commitment from these types of guys. Because if you can’t be committed to anyone else, you should always commit to yourself. Commit to moving on as soon as you realize the relationship is not going anywhere.
Don’t allow your heart to continue to fall for someone who’s not ready. Whatever you do, don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault that these guys just aren’t ready for the awesomeness that is you.
With hugs and kisses xoxo