Q. Everything I read about love and life in general is always telling women what they are doing wrong, and frankly it’s getting old already. I would love to contribute to a site that instructs men how to treat women. Why are you always telling women what they could be doing better? Why not tell the men how to prepare for us women? StacyT.
A. Hey Stacy, that’s a great question and I’m glad you asked.
The number one reason why most husbands don’t want to come to counseling is because they assume the counselor will be a woman. And because their wife is a woman, the two of them will team up and beat up on him.
But they are surprised when they get to the 1st session and find that my husband and I are teamed up to conduct the session together.
Just seeing another male in the room automatically helps them to loosen up because they feel like they’ll be understood. Sometimes, they end up talking more than their wives : )
My husband conducts private sessions and he teaches group classes with me. But that’s ALL.
A writer he is not.
There are a lot of things he does well and for that I’m grateful. I didn’t want to push the button and ask him to flow in a capacity that he wasn’t comfortable in.
So when I decided to explore blogging, I intentionally chose to write from a female perspective to a female audience for a few reasons.
- Men want to hear from other men. Some things are received better if they come from someone they feel they can relate to. There are a few relationship blogs for men that are mostly written by other men, but this isn’t one of them.
- Women are more likely to seek self-help advice and encouragement when it comes to relationships. In most cases, it is the wife or fiancé who initiates a counseling session when a couple comes in for help. We are more interpersonal by nature and most of us like to read. So when it comes to understanding relationships and fixing relational problems, we’re not shy about getting help.
- The typical man reads about sports, cars, business, finance and other things that peak the male interest. Very few men will reach for self-help regarding their relationships or future relationships. And if men aren’t going to make the effort to understand women so that they can save relationships, somebody has to do it. For the sake of mankind, it may as well be you. Girl, put your SuperGirl cape on and save the day.
I hope that answers your question Stacy. Keep ‘em coming.